The quiet stillness of deep night surrounding him, Colonel Jack O'Neill stood on the rooftop deck of his home, hands stuffed in his pockets, gazing up into the clear sky at a distant spot of light. The Abydos star system. There had been so many times in the past seven years that he'd stood right here and looked toward that particular point in the heavens. Always before he had taken some measure of comfort in just knowing Abydos was there, its people living their lives in peace and freedom. Tonight, the view offered no comfort. He would never again be able to walk through the gate onto that desert world, walk among its strong, proud yet gentle people. They were all gone. The Abydos Stargate was gone. Abydos still existed, but on a plane of existence he could no longer reach, no longer touch.

Just like he could no longer touch the man whose face he had recalled so often those nights when he first located Abydos in the chill Colorado night sky, the man who'd made that maiden journey with him, the man who had saved his life, then stayed behind to make a new home for himself. The same man who had later stood here beside him as they both remembered the world they had together discovered and left behind.

"Look," Jack said softly, "I know this is all about journeys and paths and a bunch of cryptic phrases and mumbo-jumbo metaphors that are never gonna make any sense to someone like me, but you had to know, didn't ya? I mean, that's what you folks do, right? Know... stuff? You had to know he couldn't just stand by and watch it happen and not try to help. I don't care how much he'd changed physically. It's not just what he does, it's who he is. It's what being him is all about. Maybe for a while it worked out for him - this ascended gig. Maybe he was happy as a ghost. He seemed happy about it when he came to visit me in Baal's prison. Kept tryin' to convince me how great it was, wanted me to join the club. That's why I let him go in the first place - before, when he was... dying, it was what he wanted. He thought he could make a difference - do some good.

"But then you guys had all those rules. Come on, you know Daniel and rules. He's never quite understood the concept. Rules were things he followed when they made sense to him. You couldn't just tell him to do something and expect him to say, "yes, sir" and be a good little soldier and never question why. And even when that oh-so-wrinkled brain of his understood the reason for the rule, it was never enough if his heart told him something different.

"So he broke a few... little rules. Big deal. Believe me, I know how damned infuriating it can be when he doesn't do what he's told. I can't tell you how many times I just wanted to take him by the shoulders and give him a good shake or maybe even knock him around a bit just to force some common sense into him. But you can't do that with Daniel. If you could, he wouldn't be Daniel. And whether he's flesh and blood or a glowy ball of energy, he's still Daniel.

"You could take the soul out of the human being, but you couldn't take the humanity out of his soul.

"So you gotta understand that he couldn't just watch those people die. You couldn't expect him to sit back and do nothing while the only place he'd ever been truly happy was destroyed. So many times before, he lost people he loved and there wasn't a damned thing he could do about it, no matter how hard he tried. His parents. Sha're. I saw how much he loved those people on Abydos - and how much they loved him - when I made him leave them to come back to Earth with us. It was home to him in ways this planet had never been.

"He tried, you know. He knew he wasn't supposed to interfere, so he came to us to do the interfering for him. I know, kind of bent the rules a bit there, but he was trying, okay? And we tried, but we couldn't do it without him. Nothing's ever worked quite right without him. Things were getting out of hand there with Annubis, so he stepped over the line... way over."

Jack sighed loudly. "Ya gotta cut the guy some slack here, Oma. He's still new at this powerful being thing. You guys may be the Ancients, but he's still a baby... Ancient, and like the guy with the funny hair said, 'the very young don't always do as they're told.' Sometimes it's just curiosity and sometimes it's because they care too much for their own good. But when they're young, they don't think about how dangerous things like super powers... or loaded guns... can be. We're the adults; we're supposed to protect them." He stood silent for a long moment. "But sometimes... you can't, can you? Trust me, I know about that, too."

He closed his eyes. "God, Daniel..." He lifted his hands to his face, rubbing them over the surface before dropping them to his sides and opening his eyes again. "Carter was right. You would have done everything in your power to stop Annubis from destroying Abydos. But he did. And I can't help thinking... this is all my fault. I'm the one who told you to cross that line, yelled at you to break the rules. And you did it. For me. For them. But Abydos was destroyed anyway. What happened? Did Oma stop you, or did the Others? Did they pull you away, give you a good shake and tell you you'd been a bad boy, then send you off to play somewhere else... somewhere... safe? Or did Annubis..." He shivered at the thoughts he couldn't voice "God, Daniel, I need to know. I just need to know that... that you're okay. Could you please just let me know that you're okay?"

She held the still, sleeping form in her arms, gently stroking his hair as she smiled down at him sadly. "All that was meant to be has come to pass. No matter how much you wished to change it, it could not be changed. The dark one was destined to find the power he sought. The destruction was always meant to be, and the journey of those you loved so dearly has continued as it was always to have done. You could not change that. You understood, and yet you could not understand. I know. When you chose this path, you believed you had released your burden, but you could not. It was too much a part of your being. And now, you have chosen once more to take up that burden and continue the journey as your heart leads you.

"I had hoped you would find peace and contentment, that the pain you had suffered could be eased on a new path filled with wonder. But that pain is too much a part of you. The ties that held you to your past were too strong for you to break. We know much that is beyond the understanding of the mortals we once were, but it seems some of them understand you better than I did."

As her hand brushed back his hair, a soft glow spread across his forehead. "I will ease the pain of memory, but do not fear. You will once again find who you are. You will return and begin a new part of your journey, and perhaps some day you will truly be ready to release the burdens that pull you away from us now. Until then, child, I wish you peace."

The light from within her grew brighter and her form began to shimmer and shift. The arms that embraced him became tendrils of that light, still holding, still caressing him as he was lifted up. The light grew until it consumed all that surrounded them, then slowly it drifted up into the night sky and disappeared.

Daniel Jackson stood on the deck, his hand resting lightly on the telescope, and looked up into the evening sky.

"I kinda thought this might be where I'd find you."

He turned at the gently spoken words to see Jack climbing up to ladder to join him. The older man stepped up beside him and passed him one of the beers he'd brought with him.

Daniel glanced at the bottle, then took a sip. "Sam and Teal'c?" he asked.

"They left a little while ago. Said to say goodnight and they'd see you at the base in the morning."

Daniel nodded before returning his gaze toward the stars. For several minutes, Jack just stood and watched with him, then he took a long draw of his beer and turned to silently watch Daniel.

"Whatcha thinking 'bout?" he finally asked. "Life? The Universe? Everything?"

"Us," Daniel replied. "Me mostly. Why I'm here."

Jack frowned. "I thought we'd already been over that ground back on that planet that wasn't so lost. Why are any of us here?"

Daniel smiled. "Yeah, I know." He was silent again for a moment, and Jack waited patiently. "I remember a lot now. Most of it, I guess. From... before..." he waved his beer in a circular motion toward infinity. "I can't remember the time when I was..."

"Ascended?"

He nodded again. "Am I being punished for what I did? Was I not... good enough to be..."

"An all-powerful being who wasn't allowed to do anything but watch?"

"Something like that, I guess, yeah."

Jack sighed. "You know, I came up here the night after we came back from Abydos that last time. I talked to you, but I guess you weren't around. Probably already landed in that field in your birthday suit."

Daniel turned to offer him a pained expression and Jack chuckled, then sobered as he continued.

"We didn't know what had happened to you after you left us to face Annubis. You'd just... disappeared. I figured... maybe... it was my fault."

"Your fault? How could it have been your fault?"

"Well, you kept tellin' me that you couldn't do anything to help us and I just kept insisting that you had to. I told you to break the rules and you did. And then... you weren't here anymore."

"Jack..."

"No, look, let me finish. When you were dying and you asked me to tell Jacob to stop... when you asked me to let you go... I didn't want to, Daniel. It was hard. It was so damned hard, but it was the only way to keep you... alive... in some plane of existence. After that, I always kinda knew you were around. Maybe it was just wishful thinking, but after my little stay at Baal's vacation spot, I knew you were... okay. You hadn't really left us. You came to stay with me there, so I wouldn't be alone. You said you were happy, and I wanted you happy. But that didn't mean I didn't miss you like hell and wish you could still be here. I was selfish and I wanted you back with us. And then you were back... kinda... on Abydos. And it felt like it was supposed to be that way. But then you went to face Annubis and you didn't come back. You went to stop him, but he wasn't stopped. You were gone and we didn't know what happened. I talked to you that night, standing up here alone. But you weren't here, and I knew you weren't here anymore. I realized that this time, maybe, I really had lost you... forever. It hurt, Daniel. Losing you. Knowing that it was my fault. Afraid that I'd caused you to lose that chance Oma gave you.

"I'm sorry..."

"No." Jack shook his head. "This isn't about guilt here, Danny, yours or mine. That's the thing, see. When we went to that planet Jonas dragged us to and I saw you standing there in front of me, whole and alive and... real... We didn't lose you. We got you back. And I think... maybe... I was right. Maybe this is where you belong. And if it was punishment for helping us, then I can't really say I'm sorry. We needed you, and this is where you needed to be. So whatever happened, however you ended up back amongst the solid folk, I'm glad, and if I helped make that happen, I can't regret it. So, I'm a selfish bastard. What else is new?" He smiled as he rested his hand on Daniel's shoulder, relishing the simple pleasure of feeling his friend's flesh and bone against his.

Daniel smiled back at him, then looked out at the stars once more. "Jack?"

"Yeah, Daniel?"

"Thanks."

Jack nodded, then pulled him into a bone crunching hug. Daniel's arms moved instantly around him to return the embrace.

"It's good to be... home."

Jack closed his eyes as his hand pressed against the back of Daniel's head as it rested against his shoulder, ruffling the soft hair his fingers had missed so much and sighed with contentment.

"Yeah."

The star of Abydos flared a little brighter in the night sky and a gentle voice spoke soundlessly on the cosmic winds.

"You gave him up to my care and now I return him to yours, O'Neill. Cherish him."

Holding the warmth of his friend once again, alive and real in his arms, Jack O'Neill smiled.

"Yeah."

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